The True
Thoughts:
I always thought that i'm too sensitive, or thinking too much. I always tried to find reason to forgive your actions/words. I couldn't and i never want to believe that you're this kind of person. God proves me wrong, really. Perhaps, i should be angry right? But, i didn't, infact i felt disappointed with you, with the friendship between me and you. I saw your true face, and i know i'm not that sensitive at all. I always don't believe what people says. & i always thought that you're a very great friend. But yet, god proves me wrong, i didn't know i will saw the true face of yours. If were to give me another chance, i swear i wouldn't want to see your true colours. At that time, i couldn't believe my eyes, my ears, & now .. i don't know how am i suppose to face you anymore. I never have any bad thinking towards you. And yet .. my pure-ness of making friend changes this. It shows how stupid i really am. I couldn't believe cause, you ever tried to help me, you ever concern about me, you ever do things that are over a friend willing to do like ___ me a huge ____ of ____. So i couldn't see any fake-ness in you, but i saw it all ____. I'm speechless now. I might did something wrong, or whatever, make you have to treat me this way, if it's really that way, i'm so sorry for what i've done.
Reflect:
I'm so tired with the life with them. I really couldn't follow up what they are thinking, or whatever thing they do. With them, i actually can feel the differences, meaning i clearly know that we are in two different world. Maybe in their world, what they feel is right, i might think is wrong, always goes the opposite with them. I'm really tired following their steps behind, and trying to get into the life they are living in. I know now one ask me to do that, but just for the sake of being their friend, i have to understand them. I'm so different from them. Is not that i'm trying use all these as an excuse. Is just that, i really feel very different, maybe out of 10, 7 of them their thinking is the same, and the other 3 is no comment no comment. I just have to blame myself being so useless, couldn't even get along into people's life. But, a frankly speaking i really did try my best, but everything just prove i have a different thinking from them, forever wouldn't get into them, will not even get into 1/4. & i've been feeling very bad recently, tell people how sad i am and stuff. Now, i feel so irritated to tell people how i feel, cause i'm scare that they will feel irritated. I'm really really tired. Please save me , god. At least tell me what am i suppose to do now.
P/S: (more) ＊for some friend view only ＊
Please keep it to yourself, i don't want people to know. That's the purpose i private it.
Reflect:
I'm so tired with the life with them. I really couldn't follow up what they are thinking, or whatever thing they do. With them, i actually can feel the differences, meaning i clearly know that we are in two different world. Maybe in their world, what they feel is right, i might think is wrong, always goes the opposite with them. I'm really tired following their steps behind, and trying to get into the life they are living in. I know now one ask me to do that, but just for the sake of being their friend, i have to understand them. I'm so different from them. Is not that i'm trying use all these as an excuse. Is just that, i really feel very different, maybe out of 10, 7 of them their thinking is the same, and the other 3 is no comment no comment. I just have to blame myself being so useless, couldn't even get along into people's life. But, a frankly speaking i really did try my best, but everything just prove i have a different thinking from them, forever wouldn't get into them, will not even get into 1/4. & i've been feeling very bad recently, tell people how sad i am and stuff. Now, i feel so irritated to tell people how i feel, cause i'm scare that they will feel irritated. I'm really really tired. Please save me , god. At least tell me what am i suppose to do now.
P/S: (more) ＊for some friend view only ＊
Please keep it to yourself, i don't want people to know. That's the purpose i private it.
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